Be gracious in your speech. The goal is to bring out the best in others in a conversation, not put them down, nor cut them out. Colossians 4:6
A couple of years ago, my husband and I traveled from the Pacific Northwest to the Deep South to speak at separate ministry events. That weekend, we were graciously invited to stay with an older couple who lived on Mobile Bay’s eastern shore.
On Saturday night, after our events, we drove to their home, rang the bell, and were greeted by our new friends and several guests they’d invited for a dinner party in our honor. The lady of the house grasped my hands. “Welcome, dear. We’re so glad you’re here. Would you like to go upstairs and freshen up before dinner?”
I stared. Freshen up? What exactly did that mean? Was I supposed to take a shower? Did she want me to change my clothes? Maybe she just meant, “Honey, you need to put on some lipstick.” But I don’t wear lipstick.
“I-I-I’m okay,” I stammered. “Thank you anyway.” Now it was her turn to stare.
I was mortified. I wanted to go upstairs, not to freshen up, but to hide where I couldn’t make any more social blunders. How was I going to make it through an entire dinner party?
That experience reminds me of how new believers must feel when they first go to church or attend a Bible study. The Pastor says, “We all know the story of Jonah.” The new Christian wracks her brain. “Did I miss it on CNN last week?” Or the Sunday school teacher asks the class to turn to Amos. She looks around. “Who’s Amos?” Can you imagine how confusing it is for her to hear, “Would you like to share your testimony with us?” She wonders, “Am I on trial?”
If we’ve been in the church for many years, we are comfortable with our Christianese. The terms, phrases, and Bible stories are woven into our vocabulary. But to a new believer, those same words sound like a foreign language, just like freshen up—which might seem obvious to some. But where I come from, we shower in the morning, get dressed, and call it good for the day.
Rebecca Stuhlmiller is a speaker, writer, and church worker whose mission is to help people live each day in a passionate relationship with God and then go out and impact their family, church, community, and world for Him. She lives with her husband Jeff on an Eastern Washington wheat farm where they raised their blended family of seven kids.
Read Rebecca’s devotions.
