For as long as I can recall, until recently, the fear of rejection ruled my life. My reactions to certain irritants were completely irrational. At one point, I had read so many psychology books that I could easily analyze my actions, yet I had no power to alter them.
I was three years old when my dad left our family for another woman. This is when the fear of rejection entered my heart. I was so young that I couldn’t reason or understand my dad’s actions. From then on, I began to attract rejection.
My heart led me. The same way my father had not remained faithful in his relationship (marriage), choosing momentary emotional highs above righteous choices and actions, so did I. My friendships were superficial. I never allowed anyone to know my heart. I did not know it myself. Deep down, I was sure that if someone got to know me, they would leave me. So, I wore masks. I unconsciously tried to be everything to every person, yet I was still rejected.
The Lord revealed to me that since I had rejected myself, others could not help but do the same. They mirrored my attitudes and actions.
With my permission, the Lord began to remove the masks, one by one. He taught me that the only way I could learn to know the real me was through His Word and the revelation of His Spirit. I have been made in His image. He told me to stop looking at the perfect pictures in the magazines and the successful influencers, comparing myself to the unnatural worldly beauty ideals, and instead to allow Him to unfold the mystery of me. He showed me that if I did not learn to like and then love myself with His love, no one else could either.
Look into the Word of God as into a mirror to discover your identity. You have been made in His image.
Eve Juurik was born in the small country of Estonia, which was under the rule of the Soviet Union at the time. When Estonia became a free country, young Eve packed her bags and decided to travel the world. She has lived in Sweden, Ukraine, the United Kingdom, and the USA. She has traveled to many countries in Europe, to Mexico, and the Bahamas. Eve has led women’s and prayer groups, worked with the youth, preached, and taught the Bible. She has co-authored some books and authored five of her own. Eve also hosted a weekly radio and a twice-monthly TV program on Estonian Christian TV for ten years. She recently started her YouTube page where she posts in Estonian and English. Eve loves art and enjoys the great outdoors. She is most passionate about sharing the heart of Father God and helping God's people to walk in greater intimacy with the Lord.